Attachment, Creating Awareness, Forgiveness, Having Faith

Finding Forgiveness for a Dysfunctional Family


Is anyone else participating in the Oprah/Deepak Chopra 21-Day meditation challenge on “Perfect Health?”

Last time, it was AHA-galore for me but this time I think a lot of the mind-body awareness is drilled into us yogis already so it’s a little repetitive.

However, in Day 6’s mediation last week there was a great little nugget, “We were created by something more powerful than we can ever know. We were born of, and through love.”

As a product of a broken home I’ve always felt like a long-term consequence of some hare-brained attempt at romance, rather than an orchestrated reproduction of love. For 20+ years, my parents basically hated each other and were constantly fighting and bickering. If all of us were together in the same room, or worse on a vacation together, it had the heavy resonance of obligation. No one was happy when were assembled together. It seemed as if us kids were bothersome genetic markers so it was always better when we kept quiet, off on our own, siloed in our rooms.

But upon hearing the above, I suddenly got a new perspective that my parents were just the vessels. That’s it. They were, and are, secondary to the greater universe beyond them. 

Somehow, in acknowledging that, it creates a distance between me and the governance and reign I believed my parents had over my formation. Now I can see how living in those circumstances strengthened the innate traits that I thrive on now: independence, resourcefulness, street smarts and the ability to embrace the non-traditional.

There are some major things in my life I’m most proud of accomplishing that I probably would never have done without possessing these qualities: moving to NYC, traveling across Europe by myself, and being able to redefine family in an unconventional way.

I’m a more open person as a result of rancorous circumstances. That’s the gift of the higher power to push us toward what we need, not necessarily what we think we want.

Regardless of the situations we were born into, we were all created out of love from the divine order. That was our original place of conception. 

I hope this brings peace to anyone out there who may have felt the same way….

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